Spiritual Fathers & Mothers-What They Look Like [The Retreat 2022] - Dick Dungan

This series of teachings is recorded live from The Retreat by AeroNova 2022. To find out more about how to attend the annual Retreat visit theretreat.aeronova.org. 
In this teaching Dick Dungan, Spiritual Father and Honorary Chair of the Center for Transformational Living at AeroNova, talks about the importance of having and being a spiritual father or mother. 

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Full transcript generated by ai (please excuse errors):






​Starting in one Thursday night, Rod, you, you just laid your foundation. Just looking at the spirit of Elijah and Elijah on the call of raising up spiritual fathers and mothers and wow. And then yesterday morning. Denise, my heart is so filled with joy for you the transformation of what God has done in your life. Yesterday after I heard you speak and heard you speak Mike, I, I went and texted a brother and sister. They're going through something similar to what you went through. And I told him, I want you to hear this message. To give hope to rise up hoping your heart. Wow. And then Woody. I don't know where you are woody. There you are. I love that guy. And, yes, the wisdom. And what he's came to our min sabbatical that we have in Texas, we're about to have our 15th annual min sabbatical. And he came and we did a workshop together. I don't know if you remember that. But there was a lot of interaction and it was intended for, for interaction discussion, regardless, regardless around a subject. And when he was quiet, and a lot of people men participated in it. And then all of a sudden, when he spoke. And when he spoke, it was like you could hear a pin drop in a room. Because there was authority on his life. And comments afterwards says, Wow, I'd like to hear more from that guy. No. And hopefully one day, we'll have that chance. And then Nancy, last night, my goodness. Really, just every time I've heard you speak, it's just been something that God has spoke into my heart. And of course, you related a lot of the things that I've lived out in my journey with other people and Mary and I personally and our family. So thank you so much. So even this morning preparing, you know, I, when I was a young guy, I had the opportunity to do some boxing. And and there's always these butterflies before you take the first punch, you know, and I found myself with these butterflies in my stomach, as I have followed just the messages that God's had for us. And so I'm deeply humbled that you'd asked me to come and speak and I know I have more than we have time for. So when you lived 80 years, you have a lot of story. And a lot of stories. And Mary and I'll be married 60 years in March but for the grace of God, ah, I put Mary through hell for the first 13 years of our marriage. But God got a hold of me and tell us our life and brought healing and restoration. So he is the God who heals, spiritual fathers and mothers you know why else as rod I ask if I would address this subject. And of course, I looked at the text that we had in the foundations of the the teaching that he did on Thursday night, meditated on those went back and reflected over those and the impact of of Have what that means for us today. You know, I started just reflecting on my own life journey, and I have to confess it, I have no clue what God was gonna do with my life. 33 year old corporate executive alcoholic passed out at the wheel drunk, drove underneath a semi tractor trailer rig in Dallas, Texas, in November of 1973, and nearly got killed, and have an incision from here to here, where they opened me up to save my life. And, and that wasn't enough, I was so had such deep hidden anger on the inside of my heart and false identity, trying to figure out who I was, you know, trying to try to make something of myself, you know, where man would recognize me. And I had an alcoholic father, four sisters, real dysfunctional family, lots of abuse. And, and I married my bride, with that kind of a heart. And God had to take me through a process. And in January 1976, I heard the gospel for the first time in here. I had heard it up here. But how many of you know that the distance between here and here is the longest distance in the world? That 18 inches, or whatever it is, you know, but I heard it from my first spiritual father. He was a man that was pastoring little rural Baptist Church Outside of Kansas City, little town of Excelsior springs, Missouri, three miles out in the country. And I was in the corporate world had been transferred there by by the company and we bought this acreage right across from this spirit failed Baptist preacher. Excuse me. Excuse me, God obviously had a plan. I watched him when I'd been through all the Dale Carnegie stuff, Napoleon Hill Think and Grow Rich, you know, I had been through all of that stuff. I've even been if you can imagine a motivational speaker or I attempted to be a motivational speaker at one time. And, but I watched this guy, and he would come out of his house. And he'd be singing to the top of his lungs, go into his car. And I'd be over on my garden spot. And the thought would go through my mind. I don't know what he's got. But I want that. No. And it took six months, six months and and finally one day, Mary always She was raised in a religious family. Most people would have thought she was a Christian before she actually made a profession of faith, although she'd been through catechism and you know, all the religious experiences, you know. And so one she had mentioned to me, let's go to the neighbor's church. And I played golf with him because he then invited me to go play golf with him. And one Sunday morning, and I just said, Let's go neighbors. Let's go to the neighbor's church. So we went there. And he preached the word of God with such power and authority, that I was certain that Mary had told him about every evil thing that I had ever done. Because he was reading my mail. So I had what I call a white knuckling. I was holding on to the back of the pew in front of me until my knuckles turned white, you know, and we left that service. I made it through that one. And we left that service and got out to the car. And our three children are in the backseat, and they'd been in the children's ministry. And they're bouncing up and down saying, Wow, this is a neat church. Let's come back here again. And I'm sitting there in the front of the car thinking over my dead body. We're not coming over here again. By the week passed, and the next Sunday, all of a sudden I said, Well, let's go to that church again. So we went back again, and again and brother Fred preach the Word of God with such authority and such power, that when he gave the invitation for the altar call, I don't know how it happened. But I ended up falling in the altar, weeping and crying out to God. That was the beginning of transformation that I had no understanding of all I knew that something was lifted off of me and I felt so cleansed. So cleansed. I had no understanding over the next few months about what it means to be baptized in the Holy Spirit, I had no clue. But I would get on an airplane to fly to Chicago every Monday morning for a business meeting. And I would be traveling from there to Columbus, Ohio or Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, or one of the different cities that was in the territory that I was overseeing. And I'd sat down by somebody on the airplane, and all of a sudden, they'd be spilling their guts to me. And I'd lead him to Jesus. Or I'd be in a restaurant, at a hotel and go into the restaurant and I bow in prayer and and somebody would come over, say, Are you a pastor? I say no, I'm not a pastor. He said, Well, I just seem like maybe I could talk to you. And all of a sudden, they be spilling their guts to me. And I'd be leaving them to Jesus, you know. Now, that was quite an experience for this guy. Because I had no clue I was still involved in the corporate world, doing my thing, you know, doing what I thought would bring me success, while a lot of changes took place. And eventually we had a chance to move to Nebraska to Mary's hometown of Norfolk, Nebraska, got involved in a church plant there, very soon thereafter. And a lot of things started transforming in our lives. Oh, by the way, our son who was 12, after I when I got came to Christ, and I got saved, he went to Bible camp that summer. And I went up to meet the bus after when he came home from bible camp, and he got out of the bus and come and run and jumped up in my arms. And he said, Daddy, I got saved. Now there's two of us, Brad from Mama. You know, and over the next two years, over 25 members of my family came to know Christ, including my 58 year old alcoholic father, and my mother. And so there's a lot to the story. And but I wanted to kind of give you an overview of just kind of our history. I know many of you, but I don't know how many of you have heard the story. Yeah, that feels better. Thank you very much. Great. I already had to turn my hearing aids off. Because you know, you got a hearing aids that come through your phone. So while we were worship, and I had about three or four interruptions over there, so this is enough, so I just went pull the phone out, off, you know, so now I got me hearing aids, hopefully I can hear you okay, but I'm not hearing the phone anymore. So that's a good deal. Okay. So anyway, let me let me share with my with you my response to rods invitation. I recognize that over these last 2530 years, and I've had several prophetic words over me over the years that I carry that Spirit of the Father. You know, honestly, I had nothing to do with that. But somehow the Lord chose, you know, to do that. I had a pretty dysfunctional relationship with my father. But I loved him, you know, and he came to the Lord and in the book, on core values, I tell the story. And since we're just have plenty of time, I might as well tell it, maybe somebody will buy the book. I'm kidding, no price, just opportunity. So my dad ran away from home when he was 15 years old. His dad was an alcoholic and beat him. He was the oldest of nine kids and a lot of abuse. So he grew up an angry man. So anyway, but he always loved the down and outers. He always loved the guy that was on the street that was hitching a ride. He brought many people home and mom and dad fed them and close them and, and honestly, most of those individuals kicked dirt in their face and stole from them, you know, because that was only culture they knew, you know, and But dad had a heart Artforum So in 1993, before rod and I went on that trip to Russia, I'm setting I'd coordinated all of the the air I was selling international air travel was my tent making job. And I was setting up my desk. And I heard the Lord speak to me. It's like two days before I was to fly to New York, to meet the team that would go to Russia. And I'm sitting at my desk, and I heard the Lord say, are you going to obey me or not? I said, What do you mean, Lord? He said, I told you to go to your father for a blessing. And I said, Lord, I don't even know what that is. And he said, Will you trust me? I said, Yeah, trust your Lord. So I picked up the phone, my parents live two hours away over northwest Iowa. Mom answered the phone. And I told her I was going to come over and wanted to see them before I left for Russia and her response is everything. Okay? Yes, mom, everything's okay. I just want to come see you before I leave, and, okay, put the coffee pot on. They like coffee, too, right. And so I drove that two hours, and I'm asking the Lord for help and got over there and sat down and my uncle was still alive, who they had cared for, for 30 years after grandpa grandma passed away. And so we sat around a coffee table, and I shared with him what was going to take place on this trip. And, and by that time, all of them had become followers of Christ, and my mother had become a faithful prayer partner with me. And so we share these things and what was, you know, prayed together and few things and, and I said, Well, I gotta get back to work. So finished our conversation. And I got up from the table and started walking towards the door, and dad who was pretty broken down physically, by then got up gradually, but as I walked through the weed, hugged and kissed and, and went towards the door to the old farmhouse that goes out side into the, the, the, the fenced in, or the, the, you know, what I'm talking about window din kind of mudroom, on the old farmhouse, okay. So and I, as I shared with somebody the other day, I often get just one word, and, and all of a sudden, I have heard this word, fulfill, fulfill, fulfill, fulfill, fulfill, fulfill, fulfill, I'm to the doorway to go out. And I turned around, and my father is right in front of me. And I opened my mouth, I said, The Lord would have you to know that he's going to fulfill through my life, what has always been in your heart. And my father fell into my arms, and started weeping. Just weeping as I held him there. That was in 1993. Dad died in 1996. I did the funeral, everything 2010. And I'm in China. And I'm in an orphanage, with street kids that have been taken off the streets into a little Chinese lady's house named candy. And I had met candy at a couple of conferences that I'd done over there. And she had invited me to the orphanage. And so one of our board members went with me, and we sat there. And we taught on the power of forgiveness. taught for three days. And, of course, whenever you're dealing with people that have had those kinds of struggles and sets, usually if you find a group of them, there's always a ringleader. And so right away, I was able to discern who that was. So during the whole three days, I set him right by my side. As we taught, and had a lot of chance to interact with him and speak life over him. Got down after three days, and I had told my friend that was traveling with me, Bob, I said, today, we're going to pray for them. And we're going to break the power of unforgiveness off of them and just trust the Lord to give them what they need. And so we got up. To do that. He moved around one side and I moved around the other side, as I laid hands on this young boy that was kind of the ringleader. I saw an open Heaven and the great cloud of witnesses and my A father was looking down at me. I could see his lips. Wait. He was saying way to go. So, wait. We have a great cloud of witnesses. So no matter how many days we have left on Earth, one day, you and I are going to be a part of that great cloud of witness. Amen. Amen. I'm going to try to weave some things. I have a handout, but we're not going to give that to you. Now we're going to give it afterwards because I don't want it to be a distraction and hinder us from being able to follow the Holy Spirit because that's really my desire is just to speak what what he would have me say I said over there with during worship last night, said Holy Spirit's your your might help her Will you help me tomorrow? Because I know I have more to share than I know what to do. And I heard the Lord said, I'll help you. That was kind of reassuring. So I'm trusting him. So several years past and during that time, we were selling international air travel, I met a guy by the name of Bob Swanger. And Rod would know him. He was a friend of Billy Skinner's as well. And you've heard the name Billy Skinner. Bob Swanger, was the most Christ like person I've ever met in my life. Being with him, for me, it was like walking with Jesus. Because I was selling international air travel. He allowed me to sell his travel, provide his travel for him. So for four years, I got to travel and issue all of his tickets traveling around the world. He was an apostolic leader, he had planted churches on every continent except the Antarctic in the Arctic Circle, you know. So I mean, he had really, really followed out to the Lord. He was diagnosed with cancer at the end of that four years in 1995, and I was selling international air travel down and at a conference in Florida, and he and his wife were there, recovering from some treatment that he had had. And so I went to see him and spent some time with him. While I was with him, I said, Bob, you're the most Christ like man I've ever known. I said, to help me understand how did you come to this place? You know? And he said, and this guy was a former, he was the reigning state tennis champion champion in the state of Ohio at that time for his age over 55 groups. So he was a good athlete, six foot five, I saw him preach a sermon one time where he we were on a basketball court, and he preached the whole message while he was shooting baskets. And people loved it. He just connected with people. I saw him rebuke or correct, his associate pastor, and I saw instant repentance. And there was never a harsh word. And I am amazed. I've never seen anything like this. So anyway, we were together in those last few days of his life. And I asked him, I said, How did how did you come like this? Oh, he said, All deck. He said, I It's been a long journey. He said, I was a Lutheran pastor. And he said, I used to get so frustrated with my people, because they wouldn't do what I wanted them to do. I've never known any power pastors like like that. Have you know, I mean, I've been one. He said, I was grumbling one day about that. He said, I was just grumbling before the Lord. And the Lord gently broke in on his conversation. He said, Son, you said, the problems, not the people. And he was like, I don't understand what do you mean? And he said, Well, the problem son is and I'm just trying to relate to him how he related it to me, he said, so the problem is, he said, You always see people through the eyes of their failure. I always see them through the eyes of their destiny. I said, I want to live like that I want to double and he laid hands on me saw that happened inside. That is allowed me to see people through the father's eyes rather than through the eyes of their failure. That's what God wants to do for every one of us. He wants us to see people through the eyes of the Father. You mentioned that last night. You're just kind of stealing some of my stuff last night is okay. Because repetition is the mother of learning. Okay, well, Bob went home to be with the Lord way pre prematurely for me. I mean, he passed away in 95 is an amazing guy. But the Lord continued to provide spiritual fathers in my life. And in 1990, actually, before that time, but in 1990, I went to a Bible school, a Bible school of practical theology, nine months school, where they brought spiritual leaders in from around the world. And we sat under their teaching for nine consecutive months. Intense teaching, but that's what I wanted to know, I needed it. I mean, at age 48, I was one of the oldest students, you know, so I wanted to get all I could, while I could, you know. And so while I was there, I got to know a man by the name of TD Hall. And TD Hall is now it'd be 92 in January. And he's been a spiritual father to me for the last 30 some years. A couple of years ago, during COVID. I was leading some young men through a book study, the classics, I love the classics, using the Tale of Three Kings as one but the Calvary Road, has anybody ever heard of the Calvary road? powerful message of the cross? You know, small books, easy lead guys guys, like small books, not large books. Okay. So I'm leading them through this study, on on Zoom, because the COVID, okay. And it started about seven in the morning, we're done at 830. And I got off the Zoom call. And I'm just sitting there kind of reflecting on our conversation with these eight young men. And this the study we're doing and, and all of a sudden, my phone rings. And it's TD, Saturday morning, quarter to nine. And he says to me in this deep Alabama accent. Well, Derek, I just wanted to check on you. Said I'm sitting here this morning and going through my roller disc. And I saw your picture. And I knew I needed to call to find out how you're doing. Now he is 89 At that time, and he's checking on me. I mean, that's a spiritual father, someone looking out for you. There'll be 92 in January. So you know, through the years, I've had many people that have been have spoken into my life. And I haven't appreciated every one of them. But the spiritual fathers that I've had, had had it have had a deeper deposit have been able to walk with me for a season even if it was just four years, four years for brother Fred Powell four years for, for Bob Swanger. And now 30 Some years and here I am 80 years old, and I still have a mentor that I can call. And so as I was preparing, preparing for this, and with the assignment that rod gave me, I said, you know, really I'm a practitioner of the word. I don't consider myself a theologian, although I do study the Bible. I'm I read the Bible. I study I said under people, I surround myself with people that have the theological degrees and have done all the hard work and I get to glean all of wisdom and insight biblically, my partner Grady strop, I mean, he's got two or three degrees and, you know, amazing guy and I need people like that because I say something stupid or isn't biblical. I want to know about it. You know, I really do. But I, the sensitivity, the Holy Spirit has been something that's been very important to me over the years. So So, as I was thinking about this, I said, Well, if I'm going to talk about spiritual fathers, and raising spirits and fathers and spiritual mothers, I think we better have a pretty good understanding of what those characteristics are, you know, what are the characteristics of a spiritual father or a spiritual mother. And so, I start doing a survey, you know, I feel like I have some understanding, but instead I got in contact with not only TD, my 91 year old spiritual father, but also peers, my peers, that I live life within, in my generation, and then also the group of young men and that I've and their wives that we've lived life with the last 25 years, but then also their sons and daughters. So I got about 75 different characteristics from this group of 15 people from 91, down to 13. That's a pretty nice, I mean, I'm not what they call a what do they call people to do survey like George Barna, you know, my survey, my surveys kind of small, but it was all in conjunction with, with individuals that I've done life with or known. And I wanted to see what they've seen. I wanted to hear what they've heard. I wanted to get an understanding of what they experienced in their life. Because if we're going to talk about raising spiritual fathers and spiritual sons, it's a good idea. We know what it looks like. Amen. So I'd like to show you a picture. If we get a couple of hope our girl Oh, here she is. Thank you, Riley. Sorry, this is not totally coordinated. I just want to show you a little really some some joy. I'm going to show you a picture of three guys along with me. I don't know if you can see it. But I want to I want to move over here to this side. We got it. Okay. Okay, so. So here's three guys that when I was in my late 50s, I, I was alone with the Lord and intimacy with the Lord has been something very significant to me through the years, because God has spoken to me so clearly at times about what he sees, and what he where he wants me to walk. So I would say, Lord, you know, as if he didn't know this, I say, Lord, I'm almost 60, Lord. So what am I supposed to do with the rest of my life? You know. And so the Lord spoke to me, as I spent that time alone, as he says, I want you to take some men away, to a quiet place to learn how to hear my voice in the quiet place. Because if they don't learn how to hear my voice in the quiet place, they won't be able to recognize my voice in the noisy place of everyday life. As I've really, so I wrote that down. And I challenged four guys, three of which you see, on this, this group, and one on the left, his name is His name is Todd, very special guy, Todd dickey. All of them are special. But so I challenged these guys, and we went away to a cabin in southern South Dakota, a friend of mine owns a cabin up there. We went to went away for a few days went away for three days. And they took me up on this challenge. And so we're driving up there in this SUV, and we're talking about hunting and fishing and all the things that guys do and all that stuff. And all of a sudden we pull up. After we've thrown everything in the capital, we pull up to a reservoir, a large reservoir, and we're looking over this big man made reservoir, and we look down and there's this cow stuck in the mud. Her legs always buried couldn't get up. We're looking at that. And we're finding that's amazing. That cow is gonna die. Well, we call some people and we got that taken care of, but that's not what happened. So we're sitting there, I'm in the backseat, the second seat, Todd's here, the drivers over here. And I was Darren and then Joe's sitting over here. So Todd says, Can I talk to you guys about something? And I said, What's your what he said? He said, Well, you know, you said I've never talked to anybody about this. He's 30 Some years old by then now he's in his mid 50s. He said, never talked to anybody about this. We He said, When I was 15, he said, My, my dad died of a heart attack. He said, I didn't have much relationship with my dad. But he said, he said he using the oil business and gone a lot. And he said, we didn't have a bad relationship. We just didn't have a relationship, because he was always gone. And then he died of a heart attack. And he said, Five months later, he said, I walked out into the garage, and I found my mother hanging from the rafters. She taken her life. He'd never, he'd carried that in for 20 years, is hard and never talked to anybody about it. You know? So that night, we're at the cabin, and Darren had set up some music and for worship, and we'd spent some time in the Word and I'm sitting across from Todd and, and, and all sudden, I hear the Lord say, I want you to go give Todd a hug. I said, No. Okay. So I walked over and just knelt down, it sat on the sofa, and I said, Hey, I thought I just think God wants me to give you a hug. Can I give you a hug? And he says, yeah. And he leaned forward, and fell off of fell off of the sofa, into my arms. And I held him for about 30 minutes while he just convulsively wept in waves. Needless to say, there was tears and snot, and all the other stuff running down my back, and the other two guys are wiping my back off and praying. I mean, really. We have no clue what God wants to do. But God wanted to do something. Because I'd said take some guy that said, take some guys away to a quiet place. Okay, well, the word got out. Oh, I gotta tell you a little more about Todd. So we go out the next month, we're going every two, three months. And I think this time we followed up in a month or two went to another cabin and retreat center, actually. And I was going to talk to him about consecration, consecrating yourself before the Lord. And so we did a little teaching on it did some worship and stuff, and I brought a bottle of anointing oil. Not this big, but probably half that big. Okay. And so I said, you know, when you guys are ready, and if this is your heart, and you want to consecrate yourself before the Lord, if you just come and kneel down and and then I'll pray over you, I'll anoint you with some oil and the other guys, we can join in and pray over you that God would just bless your heart to be consecrated before God. And so Joe, I think jumped down right away and prayed over him and dabbed him with a little bit of oil and, and then Darren knelt down and he's the one on the on your far right there. And he knelt down, I dabbed him with some oil and prayed over him and, and Todd fell down. And the Holy Spirit said to me, pour the whole bottle on him. And I thought immediately, what will the other guys think? Because I only dab them. And so I looked at stepped up to Todd and I looked down, and he's looking at me with this big grin on his face. And I said, What's the US smile about? He said, I think the Lord just told me you're going to pour the whole bottle on. I said, That's right. I mean, oil is coming down. Oh, God says you head and and that is all over him. I mean, it was just amazing. Just to watch what God was doing so so these are the three guys that started it. And guess what? Word got out. Word got out. The first word got out was that I had talked about the enemy. Enemy never sleeps. The first word I got out was the rumor that the fourth guy that didn't accept the invitation had made the comment that I had an elite group I got word of it. So okay, so I say to my honey, I sat down let's just invite them out to dinner. So we invited him out to dinner and had a nice dinner together. And I said, Oh, by the way, you know, we've been going away on on the streets with the guys you know, the other three guys and I said we really had a good time and, and I said, I understand that you don't feel like you're part of the elite group. And he just looked at me. And I said, Relax, it's okay. You're still invited. You said, okay, so he joined. And then another and another and another and that group become eight guys, eight couples that we started doing things with. Okay? They had 40 Children 24 Boys 16 Girls, okay. And we started doing have to fast forward a little bit after we did this for three years with just the men. And I would take them away to this quiet place. Understand that I didn't have a script, I didn't know what I was doing. I honestly didn't know what I was doing. I was just trying to do the next thing the Lord told me to do. Okay. And so I started recognizing that these men carry these burdens. They come home from work, they've worked all day, they work long days, they have these struggles at work and financial and all this stuff that go with life. Anybody else have those? anybody in this room or AB so rallied life. So the Holy Spirit led me said, don't try to teach the first night you're on a retreat. Just don't try to teach him. Get him out there and go for a walk. So we would have out in the country at this retreat center, we would go for walks, it would be myself. And then the three guys and then the four and then the five and then the six and then the seven and the eight. Oh, by the way, I want to do it, Daniel, fast. Well, the first time the second time we went, somebody found peanut butter in the refrigerator that somebody had left and they mutinied on me. Joe, at age 15, had the fastest tee time in America in the Olympics, for Olympic trials at age 50. The guy in the mill, he's in the he's in the Oklahoma Hall of Fame for long distance running now. He's also a medical doctor in an emergency room. Darren is a financial planner. He was a farm boy grew up on a farm, okay. So in a way we would get out there and I'd say, Okay, we're just going to go and we're going to relax, we're going to walk, and we'd walk. And we started walking two miles and three miles than four miles. And we just walk and I'll just say, okay, Joe, what's on your heart today? What are you carrying? What kind of burdens you're carrying? I want you to share them with us. And then we're going to pray for you. That's the reason the walks got longer as cramp adding guys to the deal. And so he had to walk longer to hear everybody's heart. But that was one of the things I learned to show him you got to hear where people are, you got to listen to what's going on in their life, rather than try to stuffed the word down him to try to get him to understand something that they're not even interested in at times, because there's so caught up in the struggles and everyday trials of everyday life. So we would do that. And then we just come back and we'd worship. Sometimes we take communion. We pray together. Somebody would open the Word and I just started encouraged them, okay, you got to work, you got to work with okay, and start strengthening in that group group three years into that group. All of a sudden, the Lord says to me, okay, I'm out there a day early. And I'm out for my walk the day early and I'm praying, say, Lord, what's next? And the Lord said, I got to a place where there was a big bald eagle up in the tree, and I love eagles. It's a symbol of our ministry. I looked up there I just said, Lord, man, your creation is amazing. That is one beautiful creature. And I'm just praying and admiring the Lord, and said, Lord, what's next? What's next? And the Lord said, It's time for these men to take their sons away to a quiet place. Said really I said, So what do I do with that? He said, pillars, pillars? Well, in 1996, when Mary and I were driving across the aisle, she was driving and I was preparing to do my first rite of passage with a father son. I didn't have a clue what I was doing. I just tried to do what the Lord don't. And all of a sudden, the Lord broke in on my conversation, my prayers and stuff and I heard the Lord say this, pursue the Word of God is the source of your life. Pursue the Word of God, what's that, Lord, pursue the Word of God is the source of your life. I pulled out no phones and you know, I pulled out my yellow pad, okay. I wrote down pursue the Word of God, it's the source of your life. And I heard choose. The fear of the Lord is the foundation for godliness. Choose the fear of The Lord is the foundation for godliness. So I wrote that down and wait and listen. I heard the Lord say, seek the wisdom of God. Seek the wisdom of God for the sake of righteousness and justice. Seek the wisdom of God for the sake of rights, justice. So I wrote that down. Walk, walk in integrity, before the Lord, the church and the world. walk in integrity. I wrote that down. I said, Lord, what else? Nothing. hollows. heavens were hollow. I didn't hear a word. So I just put the yellow pad back in my notebook, or my briefcase, went back with preparation came home, got that empty my briefcase say, Lord, what am I supposed to do this? I didn't get an answer. That was in 1996. So I made a file called pillars. I stuck it in a file a file cabinet. Okay. Okay. So now all of a sudden, I'm with these guys and these other guys coming out. And we're three years into this 2003. And the Lord says, It's time to take these fathers and sons a way to teach him these pillars. So I met with them and I pulled the pillar file out. He reminded me where it was, I found it. And because I was seven years, I tell you say it. You don't know what God's gonna do five years from now, with the word that he wants to say to you today. I mean, I look around and I see young people. I love young people. I love everybody, but something about just wanting to love on young people to let them know how much God loves them, you know, and they have destiny. And my prayer is that every one of these young people outrun us, they'll, they'll run, they'll stand on our shoulders, and they'll outrun us. That's our heart's desire. So we start doing it. It's impossible. If you haven't figured this out by now, it's impossible for me to make a long story short. ever figured that out yet? Okay. Okay. So anyway, that group grew, let's show the next one hunt, if you would. These are their wives, we can find that little thing. Okay, she's gonna find that right, I will find that and it's though the wives with these guys. And we were reasonably got this pictures two weeks ago, they took me out for my 80th birthday, these guys did. Okay, and little did I know, they were gonna give me a watch. On the back of the watch, it gives their names and it says eternally grateful. Just to see what God wants to do. And every one of you, every one of you have purpose and destiny and calling on your life. And they all look different, because we're all different, and we're uniquely different. But learning how to walk in a rhythm of intimacy with God and His work is such a key for that. If they find that we'll just keep on going because I want to move forward. And what you'll see these beautiful women up there that had become just very special to us. And then of course, there's some other couples also that are part of that group. But these were the three original amigos went, they went away to the quiet place to learn how to hear God's voice. And here we are now 2020 Some years later, you know. So I want to turn us to some scripture right now. And I want to read a scripture and lay a foundation. I have a handout over here. But again, I said I didn't want to get the handout out. Now I want to just walk through some things, and then you'll have something you can take with you. That will basically help you maybe process a little bit. Okay, that better. So, first of all, I want to turn you to the scripture that Paul writes to the Corinthian church and for First Corinthians four 714 through 17. As it says, I do not write these things to shame you. But as my beloved children I warn you for though you might have 10,000 instructors in Christ and some translations say Father have teachers say teachers in Christ, yet you do not have many fathers. For in Christ Jesus I have begotten you through the gospel. Therefore I urge you to imitate me. For this reason, I have set Timothy to you, who is my beloved and faithful son in the Lord, who will remind you of my ways in Christ. And I teach, and as I teach everywhere in every church, so I just want to highlight a couple phrases in there. Note that he says, My beloved children, I warn you. So here, Paul is speaking to the believers in Corinth. And he's speaking a very firm word in the opening text of the first letter to the Corinthian church. So you can tell by that he feels free because he's invested in for his life that he can speak honestly. And that is one of the characteristics of will find in spiritual fathering and mothering is you have to have a relationship in which you can be honest with one another. So Mary, and I have a relationship after 60 years, where we live in three dimensions, we live face to face with one another, which means we can always look each other in the eye and be honest with one another. So we live face to face, but we also live shoulder to shoulder with one another. That means that if she's home, praying for me, and I'm halfway around the world in China, which I've been many times, she's not with me, but she's with me. And I'm with her. So that's shoulder to shoulder and the last one is heart to heart, that I will guard her heart, and she will guard mind. Well, in a spiritual fathering in its son and daughter relationship, there has to be that same kind of safety. There have to be that, that that acknowledgement and of course Paul is pointing that out. And he says, yet you do not have many fathers. And then a little further says, I urge you to imitate me. So here Paul is giving every believer not just guys, but gals, men and women. You know, the mandate really to imitate me. That could almost sound like arrogance. But we know Paul's life. So it's not arrogance, it's just the confidence of the presence of God operating in his life. And then, a little further down, it says, My Beloved, Timothy, his beloved and faithful son in the Lord. So here you have an acknowledgement of that unique relationship. Okay? Now I want to dig a little deeper, because when we start doing these FATHER, Son relationships, and these retreats, then the Lord took me to First Thessalonians two. So I want to lay this as a biblical foundation first left alone needs to. And then I want to go to some of the practical illustrations of what it looks like to be a spiritual father of spiritual mothers. That makes sense, do we go there. So first less colonials to seven through 12 says this. But we were gentle among you just as a nursing mother cherishes our own children so affectionately longing for you. We were well pleased to impart to you not only the gospel of God, but also our own lives, because you have become dear to us. For you remember, brethren, our labor and toil, for laboring night or day, night and day that we might not be a burden to any of you. We preached to you the gospel of God. You are witnesses. And God also how devoutly justly and blamelessly we behaved ourselves among you as you among you who believe. As you know how we are exhorted and comforted and charged. Or another word is implore, implored you, every one of you, as a father does his own children, that you would walk worthy of God who calls you into his own kingdom and His glory. And I love that word glory there. That word mean splendor, radiance and majesty. And God's called you and I, every one of us into his splendor is radiance is majesty, so that we can reflect Him because when we behold Him, we're changed from glory. already to glory. You mentioned the word of shame last night. Is there anyone in our gathering today that knows what the antonym For shame is? No condemnation. But I just ask the question. The antonym For shame is glory. So when you and I walk with God don't matter what our life has been like. And I relate to my dear sister, Denise, and the trials and struggles, because in my years of alcoholism, I was horrific. I mean, when you've been so drunk, you lose your control of your bowels, you know, you know what? I mean, it just I had a lot of shame, to transfer for His glory. So we're trading our shame for His glory. That's why the glory of God rests on you today, Denise, you have the glory of God wrestling all over you. Because all of that other stuff is no more. And then awesome. See, God wants to do that for every one of us. Whatever it is we're carrying, we treat our shame. for His glory. Well, just a little side note there. Amen. Okay. So I'm gonna read three statements that, again, you're gonna get them in a handout, but I don't want to go through them so fast that we're not catching. what's being said here, the one note I'd like to make is, notice in Paul's admonition to the believers in Thessalonica, he never uses the word I read that text, he never uses a word I. Because he was always in community. He's always in company. He was never trying to do something by himself. He had one gift, a powerful gift. But he also had others with him that had gifts. He says, we did this, our doesn't use the word I, because it's not about us individually. It's all about him and what he does through us, and when we live and walk in community, the power of God can be so multiplied because of the uniqueness of the different gifts. So I'm gonna go from scriptural Foundation, scriptural, biblical foundation to foundational truth, I want to share three foundational truths that I feel like the Lord showed me one was from Pastor Swanger. I often tell people, I don't I don't share anything that's original. I usually got it from the Lord, or I got it from somebody that got it from the Lord. So it's an original, so yeah. So I can't take any credit for it. Okay. So these are three things that I think are foundational truths. And, you know, Jesus said, You shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free. And he who has been set free has been free. Indeed, right. Okay. spiritual fathers and mothers always see their spiritual children through the eyes of their destiny rather than through the eyes of their failures. I mean, God wants to impart us that ability to see people the way he sees them. And if we're caught up in our own lives and our own selves, we can't do that. Because we're caught up in our own world. I'll tell you a little story story within the story. So the fourth guy that wasn't in this picture, but was the guy that joined us the year later, okay. So he has five sons. One of them, by the way, is getting married tonight. And so you can't be everywhere at one time. But I sent the groom and the bride and mill text message this morning, I left text messages and snap chats with young people, you know, it got to one of the things that I've done with these 40 kids, when they ran track when they play basketball, ran cross country, played football, I would send them little messages and stay connected with him and tell him I'm praying for him. But I would say this, that's a remember, it's not about your performance. It's about your identity. That counts. Because that will really reveal who you are. And you'd be surprised how many times I get these kids must wear these. They must have little pockets in their skin that they've sold on or something because they have their phones like right next to them. Don't they sell? Right? Yeah, yeah. So anyway, so I'll get these messages back almost immediately. Thank you, papa dick. Thank you public. fact one of the sons of this group of eight. He's the one that gave me my, my personal email handle, pop addict 60 four@gmail.com. So, so we were out walking one day, and he just said to me, he was doing homeschooling and his dad was working in our office. And he was out in the prayer room doing some study. And so I just tried to connect with him. So I said, Let's go for a walk. So we go for a walk around our little subdivision and we're walking along and he said, Pastor dick, would it be alright, if I just called you papa deke? And I said, Absolutely. So ever since then, I've been Papa dict. And Nathaniel, who just married the girl from Colombia, South America. Anybody else from Colombia around here? Okay. Yeah. So, so anyway, we're an international family. We're an international family. Okay. Ask the Lord asked the Lord to help you see people through the father's eyes. Ask him to help you. He will. He'll help us. You show us okay. The second thing is spiritual fathers and mothers call their spiritual children beyond where they can reach in their own strength by calling them up higher in their faith journey. Let me read that again. Okay, it's in your notes, but I'll read it again. spiritual fathers and mothers call their spiritual children beyond where they can reach in their own strength by calling them up higher in their own faith journey. So a little story that I was going to tell you and I got chased a rabbit there for a minute. So Chad, the wolf man that has he and his wife, Brooke, have five sons. So in 2015, we were challenged invited to go to the country of Kenya, to minister to 700, pastors and leaders at a conference about raising up the next generation. Okay. And so when I got the invitation, I said, you know, I appreciate the invitation, but I have no interest in just coming and speaking at a conference. I said, but if I could bring a team with me of fathers and sons, so that we're not just talking about it, but we can illustrate it, you know, then I'd be willing to come. And they said, well, that'd be nice, but we only pay for one flight. I say that doesn't make any difference to us. If God's called us to do it, he'll provide. And so we did that. So one of the sons that we brought along was Chad son. He brought two sons want to Ely, who's going to get married next March. And, and then Caleb, who's getting married tonight? Okay. Okay, let's get married tonight. So, so Chad, or Caleb ends up telling the story. There's no free lunch when you travel, you know, you've got to be participate. Okay. So every one of them, the fathers and the sons had to be prepared to make a presentation before the 700 Kenyan pastors. Okay. And the youngest one, Eli, or Levi was only 13 years old. And, and Caleb was only 16. I think at that time, okay. But he told the story over there to these 700 pastors. And he said, When I was I can't remember the age right now. But he was young. Okay. And he went to his first wrestling match. So he's probably 789 years old. They stay pretty start pretty young nowadays, you know? Any lost all five matches? Anybody follow Wrestling? Oh, well, high school wrestling is big, you know? So he lost all five matches, gets in the car, and he says, and even pinned himself once. If that means that he ended up getting on his back somehow and consider the pin himself. Okay. Okay. So the riding home, and Chad is driving home and he looks over at his son and he says, you a son. I see a champion in you. Sort of just last five matches. And Chad says, Son, I see a champion in you. One day, you're going to be a champion. He tells a story. I'm sitting over there thinking I will never wrestle again. In his mind. Even never The year we went to Kenya, when we went there, he had just won a Class A the top class championship in his weight division. He wanted two years in row he wanted the next year to see, but his father was able to see him through the father's eyes, you know, and he called that up. Third thing, spiritual fathers and mothers, sow seeds. Sow seeds, you talked about a rod, you talked about sowing seed, the garden that comes forth, spiritual fathers, we didn't come here to compare notes or spiritual fathers and mothers. So seeds foundational truth, seeds are foundational truth. That take root in the hearts of spiritual sons and daughters. And when they're watered when they're encouraged, who is talking about encouragement. When they're encouraged, okay, they spring into life. spiritual fathers and mothers sow seeds, foundational truth, that take root in the hearts and sons, hearts and the spiritual sons and daughters, which one watered in or encouraged, they sprang forth into life. Those are three foundational truths that I found to be true. And I will carry those in our heart and recognize how true those are, and meditate them on and then ask the Lord for the application. Now, I said we had 75 responses, I've condensed them down to 17. That should make you happy. But I promise I've already went longer than I know I went too long. But you said we had nothing planned to lunch? I probably won't cover all 17. Okay, if you give me permission, I'm just gonna go through and highlight some of these, because they're all on the handout over here. Okay. Okay, so some of them we've heard already cover a couple of the beginning, just foundational ones. They make themselves available. And they're willing to invest time and energy. A spiritual father and mother make themselves available. They're willing to spend time they're humble, vulnerable, and transparent, in regard to their personal journey, including learning experiences through past failures. I shared so many past failures. With these couples and other couples, they know every just about every ugly detail of my life. And how God raised me up out of the pit of destruction out of the miry clay and set my feet up on a rock and made my footsteps sperm, and put a new song in my mouth, a song of praise to my god that many might see in fear and trust in the Lord. That's the promise. And all of us to some degree, in knowing Christ has been raised out of the pit of destruction, it just the pit looks different for everyone. It's not the same pit, but it's still it's deadly. appear to steal will destroy you, if you don't let God ratio. So you have to be vulnerable. And if God hasn't taken you through a process of brokenness and humbles you, you know, you can't allow yourself and please don't make I don't want this to sound like an indictment. I don't mean it that way. But my heart grieves because I have seen spiritual leaders that have not been willing to acknowledge their own warts, their own failures, their own issues in their life. And one of my conclusions is you haven't truly come to real brokenness in your life. Until you allow it allow God into the deepest recesses of your soul to bring forth His healing, touch and restaurant restaurant restoring power. Okay, I'm gonna look for a couple more. They speak the truth and love and bring correction when and where needed with compassion and grace, in a spirit of humility. So let me say that again. They speak the truth in love and bring correction. When and where needed. In comes with compassion, and grace, in a spirit of humility you years ago, the Lord spoke to me. years, probably 30, more years ago, the Lord said, Son, you have no more authority to speak correction into somebody's life than your willingness to make an investment in their life. To the degree that you've invested, gives you authority. You know, I'm not talking about positional authority where you got to give leadership and you got to give direction, I'm talking about the relational walk, I can't start going around trying to fix people, if I'm not willing to invest in their life, if I'm not willing to humble myself and acknowledge my own humanity, and frailty, and I really don't have any freedom and authority to go around trying to fix somebody else. One of the lies is that my friend Dudley Hall, TDS, younger brother, who has been one of the most significant teachers in my life, he said, one of the lies we believe, is that we, we have the power to change anybody. You know, we don't have any more the books on how to stop the pain over here. But if you haven't got that book, I'd encourage you to get how to stop the pain, we just the last two copies of our last two cases, we're out of them, I'm gonna have to order more of them. So just recently, within the last four or five months, that's pretty recent. Just recently, I was reading through that book and looking at a chapter reviewing it, and someone close to us has hurt me very badly. I mean, they've spoken evil of me. They reject me, they don't treat me well. They don't like me, for whatever reason, they don't want to have a relationship with me. Anybody ever felt that way? It hurts, it hurts. But I've chosen to forgive this person. Because I know if I want to be free, I got to forgive. So I'm praying this Monday, and trying to pray faithfully for this person that has hurt me. And I heard the still small voice of the Lord. And he said, you don't even know her pain. And I said, it's always good when the Lord speaks to you. It's good to go back and say, What lower? Was, are you? And I did I said, Lord, what was that? And he said, you don't even know her pain. I said, Lord, I don't understand. And he said, Son, you've been so focused on your own pain of rejection, that you haven't even considered how much pain she has. I would like to say that circumstances have changed. They haven't. But I've changed. I don't feel that way anymore. Was that was the Lord. You're right. I'm wrong. Forgive me. I don't know her pain. Would you help me understand her pain? So I can pray in agreement with what you want to do? Okay. Let me see if I can find another one. And then we'll close it up. Okay. I mean, there's 17 of them. So we could be here to to know, okay, if I expose it on every one of them, okay. I'm gonna kind of look for a couple of really, really good ones here. They're all good. Okay, okay. Okay. They demonstrate. Oh, I love this. And I gotta say it quick. They model an intimate walk with the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit, demonstrating faith and trusting God. I mean, we need an intimate walk I love I love the end of second Corinthians. In fact, I think I met brought a message on it and gather the last verse in Second Corinthians 13. It says, and May the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, the love of God and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you all. If we could just impregnate our, our hearts with the reality of that one verse. May the grace the divine influence of Jesus on our heart, the word of God, the Living Word on our heart, if, if we could walk in that and then the love the agape, the unconditional love of the father know fellowship with Holy Spirit. How he wants to talk to us. He wants to lead us he wants to guide us Somebody wants to do they demonstrate teachability submission and accountability. My living in spiritual community, multi generational relationships, malt I, I can't emphasize that enough multi generational relationships and a willingness to receive the input and the instructions from their peers and those in authority. Guess where that came from? That came from the children that came from the children. Because the children saw it illustrated in our relationships. I was just struck by these young kids saw that. Rod, you're gonna have to get up here and close us in prayer, because I'm gonna go too long. Otherwise, I know that. Thank you, Lord. They are consistent in the word in their love and the impartation of the Word of God, speaking the word over people, speaking the Word of God over people. They provide wisdom, discernment, spiritual thought, and spiritual insight and understanding. Let me start that again. They provide wisdom, discernment, spiritual insight, understanding, while bringing clarity to the work of God. In times of waiting, stress, understand, under uncertainty and crisis, a spiritual father and mother will be able to see things operating in people's lives and allow them to bring wisdom into it, discernment into it, healing into it, restoration or understanding into it, I just read the one above it, but it brings healing to and clarity to the work of God when God's work is being done in people's lives. It says, In times of waiting, have you ever had to wait on the Lord? Again, in times of stress his hand but ever any stress? Okay, in times of uncertainty ever felt uncertain about something? What about crisis? We all do. But a spiritual father or mother can be available to be that place. And I can't tell you how many times I told you last night and I'm gonna close with this. And then if you would come and just close this maybe I told you last night or two nights ago, whenever it was, how I led a church split. In 1984, I go off to Emmaus Road in 1990. Down in Texas, Mary and I moved down there. And we got invited to a retreat that was put on by TD in Dudley hall called successful Christian living retreat. Now keep in mind, we've been separated from the church. And I was, I was shepherding this group of people that carried the same rebel spirit that I had. And that's not an easy job. Let me tell you right now. And I'm probably the only pastor that ever grew a church from 90 to 30. And God's work working in my life, you know, okay, so. So anyway, we go down to this conference Saturday morning, we're worshiping the presence of God, it's so strong. And I'm just standing there lifting up my hands towards Lord, Lord and worship and I had a vision. And it was like living Technicolor. I could hear the water, I was standing on a bridge, a wooden arch bridge, the stream was rustling by underneath it, and I could hear the water going underneath and, and I'm in the middle of this bridge with this humongous smile on my face. And I'm looking at the crowd that's standing on the bank over there. And I'm saying and I'm looking over here, come together, started. Someone started coming together towards the middle of the bridge. Those who remained on the back turned, knowing the banks turned her back and started walking away in the vision was gone. While Mary and I at the break, went back to our hotel room, I told her about it and I didn't know I was a mess when I went to school. This is the early stage. So I mean, God just did a cleansing work every week and me. So Monday, I get a hold of TD the president of the school. My mentor today and Biggie You need mentor them. And I told him what happened. And he said in his fine southern Alabama accent Well, isn't that just like the Lord? What the enemy is intended for evil? God's gonna do in the years ahead, you're gonna be used God to bring people together. That's the love of the Father and that's been our journey. And I'm not, not done.